On Dogs and Descrimination

Naomi’s newest obsession is dogs.  She has a little fear that she has to get over, but it is definitely overpowered by her fixation.  It started during our sojourn in Atlanta.  We would wait outside the fenced area at the dog park and as each owner  came out she asked “Can I pet the dog?”   I must say for the most part, dog owners are kind and patient.  Naomi would approach and retreat a few times until she could finally pet their dog.  Over time, she was getting more and more comfortable with dogs and she’d  been pestering everyone in the neighborhood that took a dog for a walk.  We had to seriously consider the next step:  Getting a family dog.

I had a number of ideas about where we should go to find one, but a friend of mine suggested that we contact a local dog therapy business.  I didn’t think that we needed a therapy dog and a lack of financial resources and fund raising skills would put it out of the question anyway.  “You don’t have to get a ‘therapy dog’ my friend told me.”  They always have a few that don’t keep up with the level of training that servoce dogs require and they put those ones up for adoption.  We got one that was too docile for just $200.00.” 

This sounded like a good possibility so I wrote them an email.

Hello,

I heard that XYZ Therapy Dogs has some dogs that are not fully trained that can be bought for an adoption fee.  Is this true?  My 8 year old daughter is autistic.  We do not feel that we need a fully trained therapy dog, but we are looking for a family dog and we are interested if there are other dogs available.

Many thanks,

They wrote back the next day:

Most of the dogs we put up for adoption are not appropriate for a child with Autism. The few who are typically are placed into homes where we already have a working service dog and the family needs another dog for their children who are typical but can’t get just any pet dog because of the child with Autism.  I would suggest since your child does have Autism that you consider a service dog. 

Does anyone else bristle while reading this?  Yes, I understand they are a business and their business is therapy dogs which take time, money and resources to train, so that’s what they are going to promote.  BUT in this email, they essentially concluded that although they knew nothing about Naomi except that she had the ‘autism’ label, any dog other than a service dog would be inappropriate for her family.   This is an organization that is supposed to advocate for our children and this is what they think?   They so clearly could have said essentially the same thing without suggesting I was making an inappropriate move in looking for a family dog.  Here, XYZ Therapy Dogs, this is just one example of what you could have said:

We don’t have many dogs for adoption and when we have them, we give priority to families that have a working service dog. Service dogs are our focus and it is unlikely that we will have additional dogs available for adoption.  Please let us know if you should become interested in a service dog.  

This way your telling me that we won’t be able to adopt a dog from you without saying “NO WAY CAN YOUR FAMILY HAVE A REGULAR DOG IF SOMEBODY IN IT HAS AUTISM!”

Many families with autistic children have regular family dogs and they do just fine.  XYZ Therapy Dogs obviously doesn’t want to acknowledge them.  So fine.  Screw you XYZ Therapy Dogs!

My next move was to go to the local library with Naomi to take part in “Tail Waggin’ Tutors” program.  Essentially, it’s an opportunity for children to read to therapy dogs.  I had told Naomi where we were going and she was excited. 

We walked into the room with dogs as directed by the librarian and a woman came in after us.  “You can’t just go in there!” She scolded.

“Oh, I’m sorry. We haven't been here before. How do we go about this?”

“You have to sign up for a time.”

“Okay.  How do we sign up? “

She lead me over to a schedule on the wall.   “Does she read independently,’ she said, gesturing toward Naomi.

“No.”

“Well then she can’t participate.”

“She has to be able to read independently to see a dog?”  I asked incredulously.

“Yes, because it’s tutoring.”

“If she could read independently, she wouldn’t need a tutor.  She has a disability and you’re going to exclude her because of it?’

The woman shrugged.  “That’s how this program works.”

“That is awful and it is cruel,” I said and we walked out of the children’s area.

To be clear, there were lots of time slots available.  They would rather that they go unfilled than give them to a child with a reading disability.  After all, why should therapy dogs can’t be used on children with disabilities. 

I couldn’t let this go.  I told the librarian on the way out.  She was a very kind woman.  She gave me information on who to contact about my concerns and we left.

I haven’t called yet.  I wish I had her email.  It would be easier to write.  They may make an exception for us and tell us we can come and participate next time, but I don’t think I want to.  Once you’ve complained you become ‘that parent’ -  the pushy one who can’t take ‘no’ for an answer.  If Naomi is not absolutely perfect during the next Tail Waggin’ time, I imagine the organizers will roll their eyes at each other and I will feel self-conscoius.   But I still will call.  I want the next disabled child who goes to that program to be allowed to take part.  So, it won’t be for Naomi, but it will be for some one.  Sigh* Another ‘teachable moment.’

So here's the bigger question - Why all the trouble with Dogs and people with autism.  Why do dogs have to be rigorously trained to even live among them? Why do children with reading disabilities need to be filtered from their programs.  If people with ASD deserve to be seen as equals and integrated into our society doesn't that society include dogs?  We've got a long way to go.